I fell asleep last night thinking about this. . . BIG topic. What brought this to mind was a friend who let me know that a video of La Cella Bella was finally ready! And that made me think of another video that another friend took of a concert that I recently played in. . .I made mistakes! I haven't had the courage to watch the video yet. . . I know what I did!
As I pondered this, I remembered a quartet member who came to me after we had played, apologizing for mistakes she had made. I said to her, "It's not about mistakes." Wow! I think I need to listen to myself!
Music, to me, is emotion. Pure, raw emotion. It is the expression of life. It can take us places that we never thought possible. . .transporting us to another realm, another dimension! It is not about mistakes.
As a musician, I always strive to be perfect, or at least my idea of perfection! To have every note in its' proper place and time! I have yet to achieve that but, one thing I have achieved (I think) is playing from my heart. Playing every note with emotion. I had a teacher who told me once. . ."never play a note until it is time to play that note" . . . . I think of that every time I play.
I went to a concert once where a cellist was playing the Haydn C Major cello concerto. I have a special place in my heart for that piece. Having studied it in college, I knew every nuance of the piece. I was anxious to hear this cellists' interpretation of it. Her playing was incredible. . .every note in its' place, technically perfect. But, the performance left me cold. I felt no emotion, it did not move me anywhere! It did not send me to that special place in my mind where nothing exists but the music.
There were no mistakes in that performance but. . .there was also no emotion. So, music is not about mistakes, as life is not about mistakes. We all make them but do we all have the courage to forgive ourselves and move on? No one is harder on me than me. . .I easily can forgive others mistakes but can I give myself the same courtesy? In life we need our mistakes to keep us growing, in music we need our mistakes to keep us human, to keep us real, and to keep us motivated to play totally from the heart.
So, I guess I should watch the video and try to simply listen to the emotion, easy to say and not so easy to do!
My mantra . . . ."it's not about the mistakes!"
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Reminiscence
In the last few days I have been bombarded with memories! Thanks to cyber space I have reconnected with old friends mostly from my music days in Canada. "Those were the days my friends. . . ." has been my mantra. So many years ago and SO much music. It has me thinking about how music never dies, it fades a bit but it never dies!
A good friend of mine from many years gone by sent some lyrics for me read to read. As I read, so many other songs began popping up, all pertaining to the same basic thought. And, of course, that lead me to thinking about other lyrics that pertain to other aspects of life, etc., etc, etc. The next thing I know, I am thinking about the past in terms of lyrics of songs. . . when my kids were really little (not that I EVER regret staying home to raise them, but upon the odd time I found myself missing the old "band" days) "such are the dreams of the everyday housewife. . . ." (Glen Camble) And the lost loves in my life. . ."strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words".....(Killing Me Softly, Roberta Flack) Then the recovery (possibly from both?) "let it be, let it be, let it be , let it be! Whisper words of wisdom, Let it be. . . " And the times I ever felt my dreams were "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". Thinking of when I decided to leave Canada and all the very many friends I had there. . ."don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you've got till it's gone. . . ."
It is amazing the connections one can make with songs. Even my own ( this is for the people who knew me with Watson and Reynolds) songs. . . You gave me my smile was written for a lover from way back with whom I have just reconnected (did you know that?) Look To Your Soul. . . who hasn't done some soul searching?
But back to the songs that everyone knows. . . when I am feeling energized and positive, I think. . "you can do magic, you can have anything that you desire. . ." and then for the days when I am scratching my head. . ."sometimes I wonder" (that's from "Mirth")
Music is life, life is lyrics. Pick any aspect and there is a song! I thank my Canadian friends who have inspired me and have reminded me of their friendship, that, along with the music, will never die!
A good friend of mine from many years gone by sent some lyrics for me read to read. As I read, so many other songs began popping up, all pertaining to the same basic thought. And, of course, that lead me to thinking about other lyrics that pertain to other aspects of life, etc., etc, etc. The next thing I know, I am thinking about the past in terms of lyrics of songs. . . when my kids were really little (not that I EVER regret staying home to raise them, but upon the odd time I found myself missing the old "band" days) "such are the dreams of the everyday housewife. . . ." (Glen Camble) And the lost loves in my life. . ."strumming my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words".....(Killing Me Softly, Roberta Flack) Then the recovery (possibly from both?) "let it be, let it be, let it be , let it be! Whisper words of wisdom, Let it be. . . " And the times I ever felt my dreams were "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". Thinking of when I decided to leave Canada and all the very many friends I had there. . ."don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you've got till it's gone. . . ."
It is amazing the connections one can make with songs. Even my own ( this is for the people who knew me with Watson and Reynolds) songs. . . You gave me my smile was written for a lover from way back with whom I have just reconnected (did you know that?) Look To Your Soul. . . who hasn't done some soul searching?
But back to the songs that everyone knows. . . when I am feeling energized and positive, I think. . "you can do magic, you can have anything that you desire. . ." and then for the days when I am scratching my head. . ."sometimes I wonder" (that's from "Mirth")
Music is life, life is lyrics. Pick any aspect and there is a song! I thank my Canadian friends who have inspired me and have reminded me of their friendship, that, along with the music, will never die!
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